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The challenges of dating with a disability don’t begin and end in the bedroom—they start with education, move to dating and accessible spaces and encompass sexual preferences that may change as your disability does.

*** While schools across Canada are still debating what broad information about sex education is appropriate, and when to teach it, specific education about sexual health and disability isn’t even on their radar.

Any of those scenarios would do a number on your self-esteem.

For years after Kaleigh Trace, 30, sustained an incomplete spinal cord injury at age 9–which landed her in a wheelchair and affected her mobility, sensation, and bladder control–she received absolutely zero information about sex.

“There wasn’t a lot of [sex ed], especially in rural Canada.

I guess we had one day when we were brought to the gym [to learn].

But I didn’t attend gym classes,” says Trace, who’s now an educator at Halifax sex shop Venus Envy and author of get wet. The things some people say will feel good won’t necessarily feel good for me,” says Trace.

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